Success and Freedom

In Order To Achieve Lasting Success: 10 Tips To Become An Attractive Person

by Meiko Patton

Twentyy percent of this year is gone. Question, have you reached 20 percent of your goals?
If one of your goals is to be successful in any area of your life or career before 2017 comes to an end, the one thing you must to do is to become an attractive person.

Late motivational speaker Jim Rohn once said, “Success is something you attract by the person you become.” Rohn of course, isn’t referring to external attractiveness, rather the internal kind.
If you want success and all that it brings, you have to become a better, more attractive person. Period.

Rohn continues, “Your level of success will rarely exceed your level of personal development.”
You become attractive by developing yourself into the person you need to be in order to attract, create, and sustain the level of success you want in your life.

How so?
In his book, The Morning Miracle, author Hal Elrod says that we all want “Level 10” success in every area of our lives, such as:
Health
Happiness
Finances
Relationships
Career
Yet our level of personal development is not currently at a “Level 10”. Personal development can be summed up as the following:
Knowledge
Experience
Mindset
Beliefs

So when Rohn says, “Your level of success will rarely exceed your level of personal development,” he means that if your knowledge, experience, mindset and beliefs are not also at a “Level 10”, you will never experience “Level 10” happiness in any significant area of your life.
Life will always be a struggle, because, as he states, our outer world will always be a reflection of our inner world. Your level of success or lack thereof will always parallel your level of personal development.
Personal development starts by taking 100 percent responsibility for everything in your life. This includes the level of your achievements, the results you produce or lack thereof, the quality of your relationships, the state of your health, your income, your debts, your feelings, your thoughts and emotions.
That isn’t always easy. Why?

Because most of us have been conditioned to blame something outside of ourselves for the parts of our life that we don’t like or aren’t working. For instance do you blame any of the following people/situations for the setbacks in your life or for not having achieved everything you could’ve?
Parents
Boss
Friends
Media
Coworkers
Clients
Spouse
Children
Weather
Economy
Lack of Money
Lack of Education
The President

The list is endless.

“If you want your life to be different, you have to be willing to do something different first.” – Kevin Bracy

Are you willing?

If you are going to be successful in any area of your life, you first have to believe that you are capable of making it happen. I start with this as a groundwork because self-esteem is the single most significant key to your behavior. Motivational Speaker Zig Ziglar said, “It’s impossible to consistently behave in a manner inconsistent with how we see ourselves.” You have to believe you can do it. You have to believe you have the knowledge, skills and abilities to create the results you desire. If you believe you are worthless, you will not be motivated to add value to yourself.

It all comes down to your attitude. Believing in yourself is an attitude. The great part about it is that you have a choice. When you were a kid, you couldn’t choose your parents or environment. But now that you are an adult, the choice of how you see and talk to yourself is yours. You must now choose to believe that anything you set your mind to, you can achieve. Ziglar also said, “It’s not your aptitude, but your attitude, that determines your altitude.” If you will just believe it is possible, then you will do what it takes to bring about your desired result, but if you think it is impossible, you will not do what is necessary, you will continue to get zero results. Because in life, you hit what you aim for, if you aim at nothing, you will hit it every time. So now, I hope I have you convinced that you have to believe in order to achieve.

Step 1: Examine Your Self-Talk


“You are the most influential person you will talk to all day.” – Zig Ziglar

If I was to record how you talk to yourself all day, would I be pleased at how thoughtful and loving you are to yourself? Or would I hear you berate and tear yourself down all day?

Whether you know it or not, you have a running conversation with yourself all day, every day. Do you encourage or criticize yourself? Are you positive or negative with yourself? How you talk to yourself really does make a difference because if you want to change your life, you have to change not only the way you think about yourself, but more importantly, how you talk to yourself.

If you have someone in your life that constantly encourages you, that’s terrific. But even if you do or don’t, you need to become your own cheerleader. You need to become your own encourager. Stop and think, have you ever complimented someone? I’m guessing yes. Now, have you ever complimented yourself on how you look, feel, on a job well-done? Don’t just recognize other people, recognize you. Start speaking positively and consolingly to yourself. When you make a mistake, don’t berate yourself, just tell yourself you will do better next time and you are gaining valuable experience.

Step 2: Banish Your Limiting Beliefs


“When a man has put a limit on what he will do, he has put a limit on what he can do.”
– Charles Schwab

The greatest prison is the prison we create for ourselves. When we tell ourselves that we can’t do something or we are not good enough or worthy, this distances us from our true value and worth as a human being. You are worthy simply because you exist.

In the book, Success Principles, Jack Canfield outlines four steps to transforming your limiting beliefs into empowering ones.
Identify a limiting belief
Write down how the belief limits you
Decide how you want to be, act, feel
Create a turnabout statement that affirms or gives you permission to be, act or feel this way

Step 3: Develop A Positive Attitude

“Every man is where he is by the law of his being; the thoughts he has built into his character have brought him here.” –James Allen

According to Canadian psychologist Sydney Jourard, 85 percent of your success in work is determined by your attitude and personality.

In his book, As A Man Thinketh, James Allen says we do not attract what we want, but rather we attract who we are, for we are the sum total of our thoughts.

A positive mental attitude affects your outlook on life which in turn affects your behavior. Our minds are extraordinarily powerful. Your thoughts control and determine almost everything that happens to you. Our thoughts can either make us happy or sad. That’s why developing a positive mental attitude is so important. Our thoughts trigger images, pictures and emotions that can either make us dwell on success and confidence or the exact opposite. For whatever we think and believe with conviction will become our reality.

It has been said that the world is a living expression of how you are using and have chosen to use your mind. So protect it at all costs. Never finish a negative sentence. Dwell only on good and good will follow.

Step 4: Add Value

One of the quickest ways to change your negativity into positivity is to add value or simply help someone else. Making a difference in the life of someone else invariably lifts your own self-esteem. It’s difficult to feel bad about yourself when you’re doing something nice for someone else. There is also a reciprocal effect.

When you add value to others, they value you more. So you get to have more love in your life. That’s the beauty in giving. When you give to others, you benefit. The famous scripture is true, “There is more happiness in giving.” I heard someone once say, “Whatever you want in life, give to others.” If you want more love in your life, then be more loving to others. If you want more support. Be more supportive to others. If you want more understanding, be more understandable with others. It’s really that simple. 

Step 5: Always Do The Right Thing
Since your self-worth is based upon positive habits, actions and decisions, you most definitely want to stay away from the feeling of guilt. You can do this when you make a commitment to always do what’s right, even if it’s difficult. When you feel guilty about something, it harms your self-image and self-esteem.

Conversely, when you do the things that are right, you continue to build character, the same way you play Jenga. You are building blocks that constantly elevate your self-image. You become a stronger and more positive person.

To be continued....